[001] where were you, I was worried

[notafuckingnut]

[Text.  Or, more specifically, a series of them, spread a couple minutes apart]

SETH.

Cmon Seth this isn't funny. Where the fuck r u weve got a rendezvous 2 make.

At least I think we do.

What the fuck is this place anyway?  The service sucks the beds like a rock and there isn't even a TV.

What am I supposed to do in here stare at the ceiling for an hour?  This is bullshit.

Comments

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

Don't trust strippers in Mexico, man. Fuck.

So how'd you die?

Voice

[hatestriangles]

On the operating table.

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

...You serious? What, you get shot or something?

Voice

[hatestriangles]

Yeah, I'm serious. Why the fuck would I say it if I wasn't serious? Some asshole cop motherfucker shot me twice.

[Yes, that was totally the thing that killed him. Or at least, that's all he's going to tell you.]

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

Fucking pig. What'd he do that for?

[OBVIOUSLY BECAUSE PERRY WAS DOING SOMETHING HORRIBLE, RICHIE. geez.]

Voice

[hatestriangles]

Guess he thought I deserved it.

[IT'S SO TRUE. Aaaand Perry's changing the subject.]

So who's Seth?

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

Hope you made him pay for it, at least.

He's my brother. We were on a job and then... [there was celebration and everything went to hell?] Now I'm here. I kinda figured he would be too.

Voice

[hatestriangles]

I will.

What, he get bitten as well?

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

No -- at least, not that I know. He coulda been.

Voice

[hatestriangles]

Is getting attacked by crazy girls a regular hazard in your line of work or was it a special occasion?

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

One girl. The rest of 'em were keeping to themselves aside from the dancing. And no, it's not a fucking regular thing.

[Yes, he sounds a little offended by your implications, Perry.]

Voice

[hatestriangles]

So it was a special occasion, then?

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

Do you get attacked by girls who are batshit insane regularly?

Voice

[hatestriangles]

I don't get attacked at all. [A little exaggeration, but he's usually the one doing the attacking.]

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

Bullshit.

Voice

[hatestriangles]

Whatever.

[Hear that eyeroll, Richie? Pause.]

What's your name, anyway?

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

[Not amused in the least, but he'll answer that anyway.]

Richie. You?

Voice

[hatestriangles]

Perry Dawsey.

You're taking this whole Barge thing surprisingly well, man.

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

Last I knew I was dealing with either vampires or fucking cannibals. A prison spaceship doesn't seem that fucked up in comparison.

[...That and he figures it'll all go away soon; it usually does.]

Voice

[hatestriangles]

[Seriously, Richie? There's a strange pause, then Perry continues, tone no different.]

Well hey, we get vampires here too. Cannibals, I don't know. Far as I know we don't have any of those. I fucking hope we don't, anyway.

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

[...In his defense, he didn't know there are vampires here? And things operate differently in Richieland anyway.]

...You have got to be fucking kidding me.

[Panic or go hunting...decisions, decisions...]

Voice

[hatestriangles]

What, about vampires? Nope. Bloodsuckers get special considerations from the Admiral and everything. The kitchen gets supplies of blood for them to eat.

[He sounds kind of really grossed out right now.]

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

Bullshit. How the fuck does that happen?

Voice

[hatestriangles]

Hell if I know, man. This place is pretty fucked up sometimes.

Voice

[notafuckingnut.livejournal.com]

What, you saying that's not the worst of it?